“It is what is is” and other bad language habits

“Oh well, it is what it is”. I phrase I hear far too often. Often this phrase follows the delivery of bad news. It’s the perfect excuse not to dwell or take any accountability for whatever has just happened. I loathe it, but don’t worry if this offends you…it is what it is.

Then there is that ridiculous question people ask before they ask what they actually want to ask…”Can I ask you something?”. Why are you asking me this? Out of playful humour I often respond “No you can’t” with a straight face. People always appreciate the humour but never the sacrcasm I do so well to hide.

Third on my all time list is the phrase “Just go with the flow”. Most of my daily life is spent on land. I am not a seafaring sailor flowing anywhere. This is another phrase designed to remove all accountability from making a conscious decision. There are many ways we use language to avoid the tough decisions in life and I wish we could ban them.

I was recently contacted by a friend who needed to make a tough decision about a job offer. I responded with the following emoji 😬. The response was a request for me to use my words. That’s when it hit me. We communicate badly with each other by accepting the use of nothing phrases and nothing emojis. People are responding to the words “I love you” with ❤️ and 💕.

I hope you will join me in eliminating these habits from all conversations going forward. Let’s say what needs to be said and not cop out of dealing with what we need to deal with. Make a decision. If you love someone (or don’t) just tell them. It is what is is😬