I have a work colleague famous for his slice of life, authentic, simple one liners. One of my favourites (paraphrased for younger audiences) is “If you are good guy 90% of the time then you are a good guy. If you are a bad guy 90% of the time then you are a bad guy”. Replace the words bad guy with any other R rated expletive you prefer. I find this point of view so refreshing because it seems the human race currently is caught up in the weak excuse that what one does, does not reflect who they are. He or she is actually a nice person and a kind person. They just act in the complete opposite way sometimes and, therefore, should be exempt from judgement because how they act is not how they really are.
How exactly do we judge whether we are good people? Is it possible to be considered good people but then do bad things? I’m not sure the answer here, but I am yet to read or listen to a eulogy that goes along the lines of “Jimbob was a good person. He just never made any effort to show people this”. I really feel like we have all been lulled into a comfort zone where we can easily divorce ourselves from our actions. Like we exist and live lives separate to the poor judgements and mistakes we sometimes make.
I will close off with an example I witnessed a few weeks ago in my own family. One of our kids was hospitalised and we had no option but to leave the other two children alone at home while we attended to the situation. PS/ the child I mention is fine and in excellent health now, in case you were worried. I remember arriving home that evening from the hospital to find my other two children aged 12 and 8, had started making supper and prepared all of their brother’s lunch and school books for the following day. They weren’t requested to do this. They were probably hungry too…but they behaved in a very loving manner. So when it came to me answering the question of whether I thought they were good children, it was very clear to me. When the family was under stress and needed help. They rallied together to think how they could help in the situation. Their actions told me everything I needed to know in that moment. Every parent has great children. I am just grateful that I can say that at this stage, their actions certainly match my perceptions. I really hope that when my children, friends and family reflect on my life one day they can also say I am/was a good person and that my actions also matched their perceptions of me.
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